It might seem strange to say that “counsellors should be nervous”. i would put it a little stronger than that: As a counsellor, if I were to meet with another counsellor who was not nervous about seeing me, I would be concerned! Let me explain why.
Whenever I see a client, I feel nervous, even if I have worked with that client for a long time. This nervousness is a good sign; it indicates that I am ready for action. It activates my fight-or-flight response, a natural physiological reaction that prepares the body to either confront or flee from a perceived threat.
This ‘fight’ response, in the context of counselling, reminds me that I am alive and ready to engage. It shows I am not approaching this meeting as if it were ‘just another client.’ Instead, it reveals my readiness to emotionally connect with another person. This emotional connection is at the heart of our work as counsellors, making each session unique and impactful.
More importantly, why do I feel nervous? It’s not because I am meeting with a client; I do that every day. Instead, it is because I am about to share a privileged moment with a client. During our counselling sessions, we explore the full range of human experiences and emotions, from conception to death. Ultimately, very little of a person’s life remains hidden; the client opens up, revealing all aspects of their existence. How can anyone call themselves a counsellor and not feel in awe of such a privilege?
It is an honour to be entrusted with the intimate details of a person’s life. How could I not feel nervous about what a client might bring to our session? Each week, I face the unpredictability of their issues, and this uncertainty is part of what makes my job dynamic and engaging. The unpredictability, the challenge, and the excitement of not knowing what a client might bring to our session is what makes our work as counsellors so invigorating.
so I repeat – your counsellors should be nervous, it makes them a better counsellor.
